Emotional Conflicts

After being told that we were having dinner at a nearby cafe, which the first matter flip through my mind is that, "Why that place? Nothing there that is my cup of tea. Nothing favourites me." Suddenly, I made no objections and neither do I rebel. I just nodded and followed.

Upon arrival, the rest of them ordered chicken rice etc. I was the exceptional one. I wondered around and finally I was strucked by the "wheel of misfortune". I ordered a RM 2.80 Kampua mee which is expensive, little and does not even taste scrumptious. Yet I did not rebel much but just reside to a corner and keep quiet.

I knew something was wrong. Very major and very wrong. How could an extrovert like me would not blabber non-stop if I come across something not fabulous at all. I knew it. Something was majorly incorrect and I was really encoutering an emotional conflict.

On the way back, my dad asked me if I want to visit my Malay neighbour. Coldly, I replied, "No. It's so late. People invited us to go in the morning."

Knowing that I am disappointed and down, my mum added, "Just now around 4-5 I still saw people rolling in."

Cool as cucumber, the answer from my lips went, "What time is it now? It's merely 8. No. I do not want to go. Just go back home and study. Further more, you guys pin pointed that due to the restricted culture, so we must not go visiting."

The whole atmosphere went silent and so solemn that it remained like dead wood until I reached home. I shutted the car's door quietly and walked in. I strolled slowly up, turned on the lappy and browsed around aimlessly until my mum asked me to prepare myself some supper.

I did not rebel neither do I make any response except a cool "ok..". I only obey the instructions. After cleaning and cooking, I began my so-called feast. I was thinking, what happened to me? Seriously, I am suffering from emotional conflict. I felt neither happy nor sad nor down. I just wish to be quiet and be a temporary introvert. You can't blame me for being an introvert tonight. Citing a saying, "There's always an introvert side of an extrovert."

Played Ashley Tisdale's song, watched my favourite cartoons and dramas and also flipping through reference books including Mathematics, I felt nothing excite me. Ohya. I sent short messages to Tan Yee but I did not expect a reply. Cause I knew if both of us start talking, there's no end. So I switched my cell phone off.

Next, I'll off my laptop. Seriously, this is kinda dragging out my mental and emotional soul. It murders if it is prolong. Well, guess I will tug myself in bed after 9.30 pm tonight.

Probably too many things had occurred today. Talk no much.

I dropped of my 'XD' icon and so as ommiting my 'haih' words from this post.

I removed all my emotions now. Rescue me!

::LEON HA::